Our 1 Blessed Mess

Ep. 18 - Cheerful Giving: How it Changes You

Ben and Liz Season 1 Episode 18

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What happens in your brain when you give generously? Ben and Liz tackle the fascinating science behind "cheerful giving" and reveal how our brains actually release dopamine and endorphins during acts of generosity – the same reward chemicals we experience when receiving gifts ourselves!

They share vulnerable stories of their giving journey, including a surprising mountain bike gift divinely orchestrated between Ben and a missionary friend, and a powerful moment when they each received the exact same financial amount to give while praying separately. These experiences reveal how giving stretches our faith while simultaneously connecting us more deeply with God's heart.

Drawing from Randy Alcorn's Treasure Principle, they unpack six transformative frameworks for developing a cheerful giver's heart, including the fundamental understanding that "God prospers me not to raise my standard of living, but to raise my standard of giving." Studies confirm that generous people break free from the scarcity mindset that plagues our culture – the more you give, the more "enough" you feel you have.

For those wanting to cultivate generosity, Ben and Liz offer practical steps anyone can implement: start where you are (consistency matters more than amount), practice gratitude daily, make giving decisions as a family, and build giving into your budget as a priority. The rewards? Joy that transcends circumstances, freedom from materialism's grip, modeling kingdom values for your children, and storing up eternal treasures.

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Speaker 1:

testing.

Speaker 2:

Testing one, two, three testing one, two and three testing one, two and three testing one testing two testing three. Testing one, two and three testing one, two testing three. Testing one, two and three testing one, two and three. Okay, here we go. All right, I feel like it's a little frizzy. No, it looks good, does it?

Speaker 1:

Yeah, okay, Like the highlight on your hair.

Speaker 2:

Oh.

Speaker 1:

The warm.

Speaker 2:

The warm highlights, the warm light. Yeah, okay, looks good. Welcome to Our One Blessed Mess. This Welcome to Our One Blessed Mess. This is Ben and Liz, and we are here with our story of raising six kids that we had in eight years while homeschooling, managing our entrepreneurial home with two businesses and currently navigating life with four teenagers which we have our fifth one in the next couple of months, which is pretty exciting Plus seven chickens, two dogs and two goats and that's just to keep life interesting, because we don't have enough on our plates, right that?

Speaker 1:

is a mouthful.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, I know it is a mouthful, I'm just realizing that like man.

Speaker 1:

If I heard that for the first time, I think these people are crazy.

Speaker 2:

Well, we may be crazy, I don't know. I don't know, but what is today's conversation about?

Speaker 1:

Okay, today is one of those conversations I'm really excited about.

Speaker 2:

Yes, he it's so fun.

Speaker 1:

This is a fun thing that we're going to talk about and I just want to stress and I'm holding in your suspense here just want to stress we are not perfect in this. We have a long ways to go in this topic but we've had some really fun things that have come out pretty cool ones of us doing this topic yeah so the topic is cheerful giving cheerful. Cheerful giving.

Speaker 2:

Cheerful giving Such a good topic.

Speaker 1:

So what is cheerful giving?

Speaker 2:

Well, I can tell you what it's not. Let's hear it. Well, it's not like that one time that you cheerfully gave our kids a dog. That turned out to be a disaster. Well, I was cheerful in the giving it's just nobody else was cheerful to receive it.

Speaker 1:

Well, they were in the giving, it's, just nobody else was cheerful to receive it.

Speaker 2:

Well, they were in the beginning.

Speaker 1:

That was a terrible animal.

Speaker 2:

Yeah Well, it was just the wrong fit for our family it was You're right.

Speaker 1:

It was definitely the wrong thing we adopted, and who was dead set about getting it?

Speaker 2:

Oh, definitely, it was not me, it was me, wasn't it?

Speaker 1:

Yes, it was you. It was me, wasn't it?

Speaker 2:

Yes, it was you.

Speaker 1:

I was so wrong.

Speaker 2:

You were looking at me and I was thinking is he saying that it's me? No, it was not me.

Speaker 1:

I tried to give the gift of a dog to our family. Yes, we already had two dogs.

Speaker 2:

Well, Humane Society there was one that was there, and you saw a little sweet puppy and we were on a breakfast date with all of our kids and they walked past and they're like oh oh, dad, dad, and I don't want any part of it. You told me yeah, you were like no, this is not a good thing.

Speaker 1:

I don't feel good about this. And it wasn't the timing, I think, and I still pushed and I have to admit that every time I've pushed pretty sure every single time that I've pushed and you were saying, nope, this is not a good idea. I've always regretted it this is actually I'm having a realization right now.

Speaker 2:

You are I love that you're confessing this to everybody who's listening to this episode. That it just well it came into my mind.

Speaker 1:

I'm like dang every single time I have pushed and, pushed and pushed oh, you're wrong, liz uh-huh every single time. Uh-huh, I've regretted it. I know I have some marriage advice right there.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, I literally have a list of quite a few things that I could start naming but I'm not going to name and I'm like, yep, that was bad, yep, that was bad, that was bad, okay, anyway, so you got this dog, yeah. And she was cute, I mean she was very cute but her temperament and the kind of dog that she was a Weimaraner and Australian sheepdog mix.

Speaker 1:

And we thought the sheepdog would be out because we have chickens and we needed a shepherd. Right but what we got was a mass murderer.

Speaker 2:

We got a bird dog. We got a mass murderer as a dog. She took the life of many of our chickens.

Speaker 1:

Eight. She killed eight chickens, Liz. Yes, I know she killed eight chickens and she ripped into one of the coops that we had and got in there and I mean ripped it apart.

Speaker 2:

So, anyway, she ate through a dog, crate Yep, she ate through her dog crate, and somehow this dog figured out how to get in and out of her house by opening up doors.

Speaker 1:

The dog figured out how to open the front stinking door.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, this dog was so smart it's a smart dog. She was a happy dog and you figure in a family our size, like that kind of dog should be in a family our size, Right size, and we were playing with her and everything and working with her and you were diligent to train her and work with her and after she killed more chickens and it was like a massacre we just came to the conclusion that she needs a new home.

Speaker 2:

And we were able to find her a new home and she's fine and all that kind of stuff and she's happy where she is. But that was a gift. That was not a good gift that wasn't a cheerful gift, yeah.

Speaker 1:

It ended up being a bad gift, yeah. So we're not talking about those kind of gifts today.

Speaker 2:

And there's some other stories about this dog, but we'll have to share those on another episode.

Speaker 1:

That'll be another podcast, yeah.

Speaker 2:

And there's some very funny stories about this dog, yeah.

Speaker 1:

But yeah, we're going to talk about how it's almost counterint sacrificial giving, but there's an incredible joy that comes when we give something away. And so you think, oh man, that like that seems kind of backwards. Right, you like, you want to make sure you're thinking about yourself and survival the fittest and all the things that we've been right talked about how we as humans, like you know, just relate, and what's cool is that there's just this surprising joy yeah, that comes when we give and there's even some crazy brain science behind it.

Speaker 1:

You know we're going to talk about brain science If we're going to be here on this podcast. Ben is going to talk about brain science.

Speaker 2:

Here's the ironic thing you guys like. A couple of years ago I dove heavy into brain science, Like I was listening to lots and lots of episodes from Dr Caroline Leaf.

Speaker 1:

Hey, you made a disciple.

Speaker 2:

I guess I did, and I would come with all these like amazing things that I was learning and like saying this is what science is discovering and it's in the Bible, and they cross, pollinate and, of course, science is just proving everything that God has always said. And now look, ben even has his science glasses on. If you're watching this on YouTube, you can see his science glasses. Yeah, he has pure shades, I don't know Clear they're clear.

Speaker 1:

You know what? My sister's favorite color for a long time was clear, so she would have which sister was that I'm not going to say, but your shades, she would have loved your glasses.

Speaker 2:

Yeah so anyway, he's looking very scientific today. That's the point I'm trying to make. So what is the brain science behind giving. This was unique when Ben found this. Okay, this is good.

Speaker 1:

Before we jump into the brain science. I do want to try to lay like a biblical foundation, and I do have one story that goes with it. So let's do that first, and then we'll come back to the brain science, because it's really fun. Okay, but just starting out, there's this verse that I thought always made a lot of sense to me. It's 2 Corinthians 9, 7.

Speaker 2:

Oh yes.

Speaker 1:

Yep, each of you should give what you have decided in your heart to give, not reluctantly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver. So that's kind of one of our takeaway verses for today is that God loves a cheerful giver, but it's also in this non-reluctant or not compulsive. It has to have that emotion of cheerful. You have to be joyful in your giving Absolutely, and I think there's a reason why.

Speaker 2:

Yes, what is it Tell us I?

Speaker 1:

think the reason is because you connect with God's heart when you are, because he's a giver, he loves to give and it's His pleasure to give good gifts to His children, absolutely so we connect with that dynamic. That's when I feel like it really unlocks the actual result of our giving.

Speaker 2:

Right.

Speaker 1:

And what's funny is I was young, I was probably 19 when I discovered that verse and I was like, oh, it's so cool.

Speaker 2:

We shouldn't give under reluctancy or compulsion, we should be giving with this cheerful heart attitude, but I actually gave an what do they call it? Offertory Offertory. Yeah, we were at a service for college and young adults.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, it was a college and young adults, and I happened to be the college and career leader at the time. I don't even want to say pastor, but that's basically what I was. You were doing a great job, I was 19. Yeah, you were doing a great job, you were young. Yeah, they sent me in there and maybe in love too.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, they sent me in there to make sure that you were doing it right though they were like Ben's kind of green, can you get in there and make sure he's doing what he's doing? And I was like, yeah, cause I bring administration and all the things and you're five years my elder, so you knew what was going on. Thanks for telling everybody. Sorry, I appreciate it.

Speaker 1:

I outed you. Yeah, thanks, but anyways. So I'm up there and I'm giving the offertory and I'm saying, hey, you guys, we shouldn't give under compulsion. We basically just word for word this verse and then at the end, the pastor at the time ran up to the stage. Right after. Well, if you want to give under compulsion, we totally will take that too, and so I was just like it just fell really flat.

Speaker 2:

We're like whoa geez, that's the Lord. And the people who were in that audience even were like ooh that wasn't right. They were like no, that's not what the scripture says, like you literally just spoke against the scripture, right, right? So anyway, we had an eyeopening experience.

Speaker 1:

Yeah and I. But I think that's kind of indicative of the culture we live in. It's like we think about giving to get instead of being a cheerful giver Absolutely Right Like we were so focused on the reward oh, if we're going to give, we'll get back in return, and that I think, a lot of times is our motivation and I know I've even felt like that at times.

Speaker 1:

I'm like well, I'm going to give you know, so that way God will bless me. It's like, no, don't give under compulsion, don't give reluctantly, and I also think, don't give so that you can just get something back. Give from a cheerful heart. Yes, yes, have joy in your giving. Yes, and I think there's some other verses we can do, like Proverbs 11, 24, 25. One person gives freely, yet gains even more. Another withholds unduly and comes to poverty. A generous person will prosper. Whoever refreshes others will be refreshed, and so that's that principle, yeah, and I love that.

Speaker 2:

Whoever refreshes others will be refreshed. That is a principle, yeah, especially for those. And I just want to say, because this is talking about finances, right, this is what it's talking about finances, but also I think that crosses over into I'm just thinking of those who are loving others.

Speaker 1:

If you're refreshing others, then you will be refreshed right, it's a promise that the Lord is giving.

Speaker 2:

It's a promise.

Speaker 1:

Right, yeah, right. And again, like we don't give just to get back Right. But there is that promise of the Lord, like you know, and even in Malachi, right. Like the principle of the tithe.

Speaker 2:

Right, there's a testing in it. Absolutely.

Speaker 1:

And that's, like I think, the only place in the Bible where the Lord specifically says test me in this.

Speaker 2:

And I want to say test them, yeah, because we've tested him. Yeah, we have. We have with our finances, with our tithing, and it has been every good thing that has come through this house. We know it has been from the Lord. We know it's been at his good measure that he's done it. It's not 100%. Not because of us.

Speaker 1:

Not because of us Not because, we marketed ourselves or our businesses the right way or done all the things right. In fact, we've done a lot of things wrong. Absolutely One thing that we have been pretty consistent, and I don't have to say I don't know what our track record is because I haven't tracked it throughout our whole marriage, but we've tried to be very diligent on tithing, because we knew that that was something that the Lord takes a look at and he asks us to test him in this.

Speaker 1:

And so again, not that we give just because we want to get back, but we give because we believe God's faithful.

Speaker 2:

We know God's faithful. We know God's faithful. You know, we don't just believe it.

Speaker 1:

We know it, we know yeah.

Speaker 2:

And we are so thankful he's faithful. Yeah, because we're not. Yeah, this is true, this is true.

Speaker 1:

We failed a ton.

Speaker 2:

Yeah.

Speaker 1:

And I think Acts 20, 35 sums it up to receive. So when we do, when we do connect with God's heart about giving like there is such a blessing that comes back and so. I think we can go into some of that brain science-y stuff that talks about some of what happens when we do give. There's some really cool things.

Speaker 2:

Yes, and it's so funny because that scripture I feel like most people know it and quote it, even non-believers.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, yeah, for sure, yeah, it's more blessed to give than to receive.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, yeah for sure yeah. It's more blessed to give than to receive. Yeah, so, but what's crazy is? There's science. There is, and this is what you're about to jump into Get ready guys. Ben's pulling out a science hat. Yeah, we're going to go a little science-y. He's got his science glasses on.

Speaker 1:

My clear glasses, His clear glasses. So one of the things that we're going to talk about is a helper's high. So what happens is like when we give or when we serve it activates the brain's reward center and it releases dopamine and endorphins. And I have to say I have an example of this. There was one time where I was getting into the sport of mountain biking.

Speaker 2:

Oh, this is a cool story. You guys, this is a great story.

Speaker 1:

And so I was looking online and it was back when we didn't have a lot of disposable income.

Speaker 2:

No, we didn't, and my wife being the amazing person, she is she bought me this bike? Off of eBay. I scrimped and saved and kept my birthday money and my Christmas money.

Speaker 1:

You pulled off something amazing I did. I saved Because I was like whoa what the heck I did.

Speaker 2:

I saved Because I was like whoa what the heck. I know I bought what you wanted, yeah.

Speaker 1:

You got what I wanted. I was really floored. I was so happy to have this bike. I was riding it all the time.

Speaker 2:

Yes, you were.

Speaker 1:

My friends were looking at it thinking like, wow, that's so cool. It was a full suspension mountain bike and it was used, but it was still. It was a fun bike. It was just a lot of fun.

Speaker 2:

You got lost on that bike. I did.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, I ended up somewhere.

Speaker 2:

In another state. He ended up in another state. That's another story.

Speaker 1:

But anyways, I really enjoyed that bike. All that to say, and it was from you, it was special. Yeah, I had a great time with it.

Speaker 2:

I rode with some buddies.

Speaker 1:

We just had a blast oh yeah, and all of a sudden I have a dream.

Speaker 2:

Yep, which is very rare for Ben.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, I'm not a huge dreamer. It happens on occasion, a couple times a year, where I'll remember something real significant, but this time it was like a real, vivid dream. Yes, in the dream, one of my friends. I looked at him and I just knew that I was supposed to give my bike to this friend.

Speaker 2:

And he was a missionary? Yeah, he was a missionary. Yeah, he didn't have any money really.

Speaker 1:

And and then it like, and it was. It wasn't like a super, super detailed dream, but it was just that part was really vivid to me and that just kind of came like more and more each day. I was like feeling like, man, I think I should really do this. And I and I came before you and I was like hey, what do you think about this?

Speaker 2:

Yeah, and I don't remember exactly what you told me. Do you remember what you said? I was like, if you are feeling the Lord is telling you to do this, then you better obey him.

Speaker 1:

Yeah.

Speaker 2:

Because to me things are things.

Speaker 1:

Right.

Speaker 2:

Like it's okay.

Speaker 1:

Yeah.

Speaker 2:

You know, the Bible says you have two cloaks, give one. Exactly.

Speaker 1:

Exactly that you were like, so okay with me just giving it to him Because. I mean it was a big deal for you to get it.

Speaker 2:

It was a big deal for me to receive it.

Speaker 1:

Like you know, it was just so special, and so I gave my friend the bike. And he as soon as I told him that what I was doing and what I'd give him. He was like whoa, no way, no way. He had had a dream and in the dream, I gave him the bike. This is the crazy part yes, and so it was really cool.

Speaker 1:

His name is Dave, and hopefully I don't spoil my reward and him for telling that story, but I think the cool thing about it was like God directed me to give him the bike and directed him to receive it and it was just this really cool thing. I was like I was on this helper's high phenomenon. I was just on cloud nine.

Speaker 2:

I don't know how else to describe it, knowing that like the Lord had orchestrated it, orchestrated it, and then I did it, and he felt so much love to receive it.

Speaker 1:

And it was just like whoa. This is amazing feeling and he's a neat, neat guy. Yeah, he's married and he lives in another nation. Yeah, yeah, he does.

Speaker 2:

Building a family.

Speaker 1:

And building a family and and and two, he knew like where we were at, even financially, and that he's like you have a family, you know, but he like totally loved it and he knew how much you loved that bike because you went biking with him yeah but his bike was not good ever yeah, his was really old and, um, yeah, he just he really appreciated it yeah and, uh, it was so cool, it's so cool, just that you know, I got to have that that experience and feel the way that I did Now did you get another bike.

Speaker 2:

I can't remember what happened.

Speaker 1:

I'm sure I did at some point, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 2:

I think your business started taking off when we had more finance, and so then you were able to get what you wanted.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, it was right around the same time that I was going out on my own and there was more finances Trying to remember exactly. Yeah, remember exactly yeah, yep, yeah. But so other studies show that giving money to others produces more happiness than spending it on ourselves.

Speaker 2:

I love that.

Speaker 1:

So that's a 2008 study. Yes, ubc, yeah, and that's really cool, right, like you actually become more happy spending on others than you do yourself.

Speaker 2:

Yes, yes, yes. I say yes. Now, some people don't have that as a love gift. I say yes Now some people don't have that as a love gift. Right Giving, yeah, yeah, yeah, love language, yeah, it's true, so it might be harder for some people to do that.

Speaker 1:

It might be harder, but I think the principle still applies, whether it's your gift or not. Like if you can learn to be a giver, I think you will unlock parts of not only your heart but also, I think, the way that God intends you to live Absolutely.

Speaker 2:

But there is a spiritual gift that's giving.

Speaker 1:

There is, yeah, that's like a whole nother category, that's like a whole nother thing. I don't know that if I had that, I don't know. Well, if you've ever been around somebody who has the gift of giving, it is Usually they're very wealthy Because they normally show love by giving you gifts. And it's like they give and then the Lord keeps blessing them. And they give and then the Lord keeps blessing them. It's mind-blowing. I've seen that principle with people that are unsaved.

Speaker 2:

Oh, it's a universal principle. I think so. I think it is.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, I think it doesn't matter if you are a believer or not, If you operate in some level of that. There's just something that is a reward principle that I think God dishonors.

Speaker 2:

It's like a law, yeah, isn't it? It is, it's crazy. So anyway, test a minute. It is crazy. Test a minute One more thing too.

Speaker 1:

MRI studies show that altruistic behavior, so like giving and loving and giving of yourself, activates the same pathways as receiving rewards.

Speaker 2:

So it's funny.

Speaker 1:

It's like that's cool, yeah, it's like giving is almost similar brain functions as receiving that's amazing so like you know, like we all want to be blessed, we all want to receive. Try giving you never know that might activate some of the same kind of mental activity.

Speaker 2:

I love that.

Speaker 1:

Another thing in 2013,. Jama pediatrics found that volunteering improves cardiovascular health and lowers blood pressure.

Speaker 2:

I think that is so wise. Can I just jump in here real quick and just say you know, I was speaking with a mom who's a recent empty nester and she's having to redefine her life and she's having to redefine where her focus has been. She is actually two different moms I'm thinking of in this. Last week I've had this conversation and what do I do now? My children don't need me like they needed me.

Speaker 1:

That's a big change.

Speaker 2:

Uh-huh, big change, and so we discuss volunteering, putting it in your schedule, and you think about some of these ones that live to be into their 80s and 90s. I'm thinking of your grandmother that lived to be 94.

Speaker 1:

She volunteered a lot.

Speaker 2:

She volunteered at the local hospital. I mean she was even up there with her walker when she had hip surgery. I mean, your grandmother and many of those ladies have lived to be really well high into their life because there's an endorphin. That's there and they're living for something.

Speaker 1:

There is and you bring up a good point. This is not in the notes, but there's what these are called blue zones around the world, which is where people live over a hundred and more frequency than any other parts of the world, and so they're all over.

Speaker 1:

There's spots in Japan, I think, there's one on the West Coast of California. There's some in Japan, I think there's one on the West Coast of California, there's some in South America, but a lot of these places, these people live in community, strong community, and that seems to correlate with longevity.

Speaker 2:

Yes, people living older.

Speaker 1:

Yes, and then they also look at some of the altruistic behaviors and a lot of them have that built into their culture, where it's a giving culture and they are living for other people and they take care of other people, yep. So yeah, I think that's really important.

Speaker 2:

Isn't that interesting? I mean it can increase your lifespan.

Speaker 1:

In fact, there's another study out there that shows you actually have a 24% lower mortality rate if you're a regular volunteer. So this goes exactly with what you're saying that's why your grandmother lifted both of your grandmothers actually. Yeah, I married into a good family yeah. You know, another thing of it too is like when we give, we actually break something called the scarcity mindset.

Speaker 2:

Oh, absolutely. So this is another kind of like brain science-y thing.

Speaker 1:

It's the paradox of generosity the more you give, the more enough you feel you have, that's right. Which I think is kind of that's kind of unique, like that's actual studies that show right that principle happening.

Speaker 2:

It's like upside down backwards, exactly Inside out, yeah, happening.

Speaker 1:

It's like upside down backwards, exactly Inside out, yeah, thinking it is, and just through that abundance perspective right, you allow your brain to kind of change the way that you perceive things and you even perceive your surroundings. So it's just amazing when you come at things with the concept of having enough to give, you can actually start to rewire the way that you perceive your own experiences and things that are going on in your life Like you can even help you change and be able to see a more positive outcome.

Speaker 2:

It's amazing. It is, that's amazing.

Speaker 1:

I think a lot of it too is because when you give it shifts your brain from that sympathetic nervous system the fight or flight more into the parasympathetic, which is the rest and digest. So when you're giving you're automatically like getting out of that fight or flight and going into the rest and digest.

Speaker 2:

I love that. I love to be, rest and digest.

Speaker 2:

I like good food too Well yeah, that, yes, you do, you enjoy it. You're a foodie. But I'm just thinking about that scarcity mindset and you know, sometimes I remember when I was growing up and you know, if you don't know, we grew up without, we really didn't have finance, but a lot of times my dad would say we are the richest people on earth and we would give, we were giving to those around us. I mean, my dad was a mechanic by trade and so he would fix single moms their vehicles for free, or they would like bring you know something, bread that they baked or something like that. That's all they had, and you know that was in this time, but what we had, we were sharing, and I just think that you know there is something in there about that. There's always more.

Speaker 1:

That mindset.

Speaker 2:

That mindset and we have our Heavenly Father. Yes, it is bountiful.

Speaker 1:

Yes, unlimited resources.

Speaker 2:

Unlimited resources.

Speaker 1:

Right.

Speaker 2:

And I think, when we're holding and clutching on and we're not releasing and giving you cannot take it with you, right?

Speaker 1:

You can't.

Speaker 2:

And we're just a steward of what's His anyway. Yeah, so we're just a steward of what's his anyway.

Speaker 1:

Yeah.

Speaker 2:

So we want to be able to release that and just be just a manager.

Speaker 1:

Yes, of his finance. Yeah, yeah, a hundred percent.

Speaker 2:

A hundred and four percent.

Speaker 1:

A hundred and ten percent.

Speaker 2:

Oh, you're going to raise me even more, raising the stakes A thousand percent.

Speaker 1:

Okay, okay, I yield Okay, but so we had a crazy story, okay.

Speaker 2:

I know which one you're sharing that happened to us.

Speaker 1:

Yes, and super unique because we felt the Lord speak to us individually Yep Praying. And so there was a family that came across our radar and they were in need.

Speaker 1:

It was like one of those like crisis moments, right when the body needs needed to step in. And so I felt like there was some of that, like we felt like compelled to help this family because they were our friends and we just knew they needed the help. But then, all of a sudden, I felt the Lord speak to me about a certain number, and it was. It was a big number, and I was, oh shoot, well, I'm going to do this. Like Liz is going to have to be on board. Like Liz is going to have to hear something too.

Speaker 2:

Absolutely. And we have an understanding. A lot of times we had been practicing this. I want everybody to know that we've been doing this along, all along in our marriage, where we would you know, something would come up and we would pray and a lot of times we would get the same amount.

Speaker 1:

Right.

Speaker 2:

And or we both would hear from the Lord. Yes, give, you need to be giving.

Speaker 1:

Or even move, or move. I remember that was a move one too. Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 2:

Well, I mean a lot of things. So we had been building our muscle so to speak faith muscle and trusting the Lord to speak to the other.

Speaker 1:

That would have been perfect.

Speaker 2:

No, but trusting the Lord to speak to the other when one felt something.

Speaker 1:

Yeah.

Speaker 2:

And you know, let's be clear, our finances are the Lord's anyway, and the increase that we have had in our businesses, is because of him.

Speaker 1:

Yeah.

Speaker 2:

And so we're just managing it. You know, and I want to say this You're like, our bills are always paid.

Speaker 1:

Yeah.

Speaker 2:

You know it's amazing. And so when you came to me and you said, hey, I know, and I'm like, yes, we're supposed to give, and then you're like, well, I need you to pray about an amount because I feel like the Lord dropped an amount in my heart, and I was like okay, and uh, and I kind of poopooed it. I was like whatever, like whatever. Can I just say that I don't?

Speaker 1:

know if I had enough faith to go first, so I made you go first, yes, so so it had been like a week and we were traveling.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, ironically, we were traveling and we had just made a pit stop and and, um, and, and I was a little bit more on the grumpier side and um, I can't remember.

Speaker 1:

Is now a good time to talk about how much to kiss?

Speaker 2:

Yeah, why you brought it up then?

Speaker 1:

I don't know, I have no idea.

Speaker 2:

But we're in our big travel van and you say you know we're supposed to give, and I was like yeah. And you're like, well, did you ever like in a snarky little way did you ever pray about the amount?

Speaker 1:

Like you go first.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, yeah, and I was like no, and, and I was like no, I didn't. And then the Lord, like, in his kindness, was like I told you the amount because when you first said it to me I felt like the Lord gave me a number right then. And I didn't like the number.

Speaker 1:

And I was like that can't even be the Lord.

Speaker 2:

Like that is the biggest amount that we've ever given in our marriage ever ever, ever. And so when you said to me after you know, we I was supposed to be praying about it for a week, I forgot about it and didn't want to talk about it really. And so here I am in one of these moods and and you're like well, have you prayed about it? And I was like no.

Speaker 2:

And then the Lord like immediately quickened your heart, yeah, quickened in my heart and he was like, uh, that's not true. I told you. And he said and I told you, go first. Yeah, I said I said, well, actually the Lord did tell me an amount. And, um, I felt him drop it in my heart and and you're like, well, what is it Tell me? And I was like I don't want to tell you. He goes, you have to tell me. And I said I don't want to tell you and I'm not going to tell you how long this went on.

Speaker 2:

I was like, and plus we have listening ears behind us too, Like there's kids right behind us. So I'm like trying to, so anyway I say it.

Speaker 1:

You say the amount I say the amount.

Speaker 2:

And then I go dang it, we gotta give it. And then goes dang it, liz, now we gotta give it. And I was like what? You got the same number. He's like yes. I said oh my gosh.

Speaker 1:

But then we had like a holy fear and I was like we better, but it wasn't funny anymore. It's like oh crap, we need to do this yeah the lord specifically spoke to both you and I we felt like you know we should do this, and it's a lot we. We had the means to do it, but we had to like kind of like pull from places we normally don't touch, and so it was.

Speaker 2:

It was a sacrifice, really, it was it was a sacrifice to give, and you know, and we did, yeah, but then we got to see that bless someone and that man, I mean I can almost start crying.

Speaker 1:

It's like you saw how important it was for that family to receive that gift.

Speaker 2:

And they never knew it was us yeah.

Speaker 1:

They never knew and hopefully they won't ever find out. But you know, even if they do, it doesn't matter. I think it was like we approached it with the right heart and we, we did it cheerfully, even though reluctantly. I mean, I have to admit like I was a little bit reluctant at first, I was like dang, that is a, that's a large amount I'm really going to like it's really going to stretch us and it did, but we can still do it Like we feel like the Lord is faithful in this and we know that.

Speaker 1:

You know he wants to do something in our own lives and it was amazing to be able to see it really touch someone.

Speaker 2:

And partner yeah. That's true, not only with the Lord, but partner together. With them, yeah, with you, and it built a stronger bond between you and I.

Speaker 1:

It really did. Yeah, you're right. I mean, that was unbelievable. It was.

Speaker 2:

It was unbelievable.

Speaker 1:

Of course, course, your response was unbelievable, and so was mine, but you know, we're human, our humanity was coming out.

Speaker 2:

We're human. It's like, oh no, like you know, people like test god well it isn't always fun right, but it is stretching.

Speaker 1:

It's stretching, but it is.

Speaker 2:

It's amazing, and so that's a I'm glad you brought that story up. That's a good story it was.

Speaker 1:

I mean, it's just so it was so wonderful to see you know, know again that helper's high. Like it was like man I get to do this. Like I get to partner with the Lord and I get to give and I even get to see. Sometimes we don't get to see right Like sometimes we just have to give and just the trust that the Lord's going to take care and you know it's going to it's going to meet the need.

Speaker 1:

But we actually got to see the need being met and you know we were we were um most of them looking for like we were anonymous, yeah, and so that was really cool being able to see it and the person was like rejoicing like oh, I wonder who that was.

Speaker 2:

So that was, yeah, it was fun, it was super fun, super duper fun. Yeah, good, good story, good story so some takeaways here, some practical takeaways all right all right, uh, there's a book called the Treasure Principle by Randy Alcorn. Great book, you guys Great book. Highly recommend getting it.

Speaker 1:

I want to go through the six little principles that are in his book, because I feel like this is super applicable and it's the right mindset when you want to cultivate a cheerful giver's heart. Can I?

Speaker 2:

say the first one. You can definitely. Okay, you can say all of them. Oh good, okay, great. Number one is God owns everything. I'm just his money manager. I said that earlier.

Speaker 1:

You did, I did.

Speaker 2:

So that is the truth. He owns it all. He owns the cattle on a thousand hills.

Speaker 1:

He owns I mean like, practically, what does that mean? Does that mean like we need to use a resource for deciding where the money goes? Absolutely.

Speaker 2:

I think so. I do think so, and I think also that when we were using him, so to speak, as a resource, we put it in our budget, we recognize it. When there's increase, we ask the Lord what do you want us to do with it? It doesn't just mean that all the time you're putting in stocks and bonds and you're squirreling it away. That is very important. We want to.

Speaker 2:

We want to be mindful of our finances and you and I being entrepreneurs, we know we have to have so much um in our reserve in case there's a drought which there has been, and so, but also, too, when there is there is the um increase, we have an understanding and when a need arises, maybe that money's put aside and we're like okay, so that money is supposed to go there, and so being diligent in that, but recognizing that we're just his managers and it's so because I grew up. I grew up on the other end, where if we were going to give to others, it was maybe resources we had or time volunteering, things like that, we never could give money.

Speaker 1:

That's important.

Speaker 2:

We could never give money when I was growing up. However, because of the kind of family I grew up in, we received people obeying the Lord and giving finance. Or you know buying our groceries or putting gas in my mom's car. You know paying for her breaks or for her. You know my dad or whatever it may be, you know for the materials breaks, or for her you know my dad or whatever it may be.

Speaker 2:

you know for the materials to make that happen, and so, being on the other end of that, I know what it's like to receive and.

Speaker 2:

I also know when it's like what it's like when you don't have the money for the electric bill and your, your power is about to be turned off. I mean, there was one time we couldn't pay our electric bill and we didn't have electricity for two weeks, two, two weeks, wow, two, whole weeks, wow, yeah. And out of the kindness of someone's heart, heard about it and gave and paid that bill, and so you know, I know what that's like to be on the other side, and for some people it's just like, well, it's just a couple hundred dollars. I don't know what good it would do, but it could be.

Speaker 1:

Massive, massive.

Speaker 2:

And so we the Lord talks about the woman who came in the Bible with her two mites, and how precious that was.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 2:

So it doesn't matter the amount.

Speaker 1:

Right, I think it's the heart and the posture.

Speaker 2:

Okay, so number two.

Speaker 1:

Well, that's pretty much it.

Speaker 2:

Number two yeah, number two, the heart always goes where I put God's money.

Speaker 1:

Yes, that's important, like your treasure will be where your heart will be, where your treasure is. Yeah, so you, yeah, you, just you gotta like use that principle Right, and that's how you can kind of direct your heart. Absolutely Right, it's almost putting the cart before the horse. You know, it's like I'm going to give, even if my heart's not in it, and then watch what happens.

Speaker 1:

So, yeah, I mean, I feel like we're not always perfect in how we we, you know come across giving opportunities, but the times where we've really like, just felt the Lord and we decided, you know we're, we're going to do this and be unselfish.

Speaker 2:

Right.

Speaker 1:

Like man. I can't tell you how many times your heart just comes alive when you partner with them in that and I want to say too, like when you're giving, you have to put hands off of it Like you, really no strings attached and you and I kind of have that understanding of somebody comes to us and they say, hey, can I borrow money?

Speaker 2:

You and I will talk about it and we'll pray and we'll be in agreeance, and then we give them the money. And if they want to pay it back, they can. But we're now, don't y'all start coming to us asking us for money. Okay, but we will say this is a gift.

Speaker 2:

this is a gift to you and also, when we give, we don't want to say hey, there's strings attached to it. You have to take this money and use it the way that we think. Now, if there is an issue that's there and you know that maybe there's substance abuse or something like that, just go pay their bill for them, go pay their rent for them.

Speaker 1:

Like you know, there's benevolence. Do what they need. Yeah, Do what they need.

Speaker 2:

There's benevolence ministries at lots of churches and they have oftentimes benevolence pastors and they do these exact things. But you know, be smart with it, exactly. Be a manager. Yeah, be smart with it All right, what's number three? Oh, heaven, not earth, is my home.

Speaker 1:

Okay, so having that heavenly perspective, that's super important giving. Yes, right, because really we're just talking about a short little time on earth and a really really, really, really, really long time in heaven, and so obviously, the priority is yeah. Eternity. Obviously, the priority is eternity. So, like the things that we do on earth that affect eternity, like we have to be locked in on those things. Like the things that we do on earth that affect eternity, like we have to be locked in on those things.

Speaker 2:

And this affects eternity, it does. The Lord is watching Right.

Speaker 1:

He asked, like you know, and like even in I believe it's Matthew, where he's asked, like the people that are before him, asking Lord, when did we see you hungry? When?

Speaker 2:

did we see you thirsty?

Speaker 1:

You know, it's like when you did the least unto the least of these my brothers, and so like we have to keep in mind. Yeah, like our giving is not just about that person or about us, it's also about the Lord.

Speaker 2:

That's right.

Speaker 1:

We're giving it unto the Lord.

Speaker 2:

So yeah, eternity is super important, not earth is also about the Lord. That's right. We're giving unto the Lord.

Speaker 1:

So, yeah, eternity is super important. Heaven, not earth, is my home. Yeah. And number four, I think, is kind of a similar concept I should live not for the dot but for the line, and obviously the dot representing earth, the line representing eternity, so good. And then, number five giving is the only antidote to materialism. We live in a very materialistic culture. I mean, I admit I'm materialistic.

Speaker 2:

I'm not going to say anything. I'm taking deep breaths over here.

Speaker 1:

Speaking of my upbringing, yeah, I think I just have some tendencies where, like, if I think I need it, I'll just go out and get it, and it's like whoa slow down, okay.

Speaker 2:

So today we ran into Ben's cousin and he said we were talking about something. Oh, we told him we have goats, and he goes oh, ben the idea man. And I go, you're right. He goes, yeah, ben's always been an idea man. I go, you're right. And then he goes he also is a thing man. This guy has everything. He's like Ben. What was that recent thing you had that I couldn't believe you owned? Yeah, because he needed it, needed it, and you let him borrow it and it was like a camera.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, it was a, it was a little camera that like a snake? Yeah, it's like a snake camera you use it to go and figure out little, small spaces and get visibility into what's there, and so he needed one, and I had one, of course uh-huh, of course he goes.

Speaker 2:

You know, ben always ben's, just that guy always has it.

Speaker 1:

So yeah, anyway but anyway, so I but anyway. So I'm trying to get better at that.

Speaker 2:

You are.

Speaker 1:

Not always just satisfy every desire. Where I think I need something, but actually pray about it, consult you. That's been a hard one. I feel like I'm finally getting over, realizing that there's another person that I have to ask besides myself.

Speaker 2:

Two decades later 20 years.

Speaker 1:

Some people are slow learners, but anyways.

Speaker 2:

No, it's okay.

Speaker 1:

Giving is really the only antidote to materialism.

Speaker 2:

I agree.

Speaker 1:

I feel like when you give it's so counterculture.

Speaker 2:

It is.

Speaker 1:

It's so about not yourself, hopefully, if you're doing it with a chill for heart and you're doing it as unto the Lord and you really just you're focusing on that person, one receiving the gift. And I mean we live in a selfish culture, we live in a materialistic culture. When you're giving, you're going against that. So it's amazing.

Speaker 2:

It's good, it's good, all right.

Speaker 1:

Number six Number six Go for it.

Speaker 2:

God prospers me not to raise my standard of living, but to raise my standard of giving. That's why he prospers you.

Speaker 1:

Yeah.

Speaker 2:

And we've seen it in our life. We have, yeah, we haven't.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, it's amazing to be able to help people in need. Yes, you know, it's just. It's so cool. It's so cool to be able to see there's a pattern, even in our giving, where certain individuals have come across like a type of individual.

Speaker 2:

Yes, yes, and you know what I'm talking about. I do. I don't want to say just because no, yeah.

Speaker 1:

But anyways. So there's a certain type of individual that comes across our radar and we just feel like we're supposed to give to these type of people and it is so.

Speaker 2:

It's an assignment.

Speaker 1:

It's fascinating.

Speaker 2:

Yes, it is.

Speaker 1:

It's really fascinating because even people who interact with us in material means are these type of people, and I know I'm being cryptic here, so just work with me, but it's just fascinating. The Lord really loves a certain people group, and those people groups are the ones that have no other means have no other way to support themselves and they have no other way to ever repay us.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, exactly that.

Speaker 1:

And so when we focus in, for whatever reason, that's just been what the Lord's asked us to focus on.

Speaker 2:

We like doing it in secret.

Speaker 1:

And man, there's such a reward, yes, there's such a reward and being able to say, hey, we help those type of people.

Speaker 2:

But they don't even know. They don't even know. Yeah, it's amazing, it's super fun, it's super fun.

Speaker 1:

It's, it's almost. You just have to try it, just have to take our word for it. See, see how it goes so okay, those are some of the six steps that were in that book. What about just some practical steps to cultivate a cheerful giver's heart, like where do you start with this right? Let's say, like, maybe you've been a little bit more materialistic or you've been selfish and you know, like me, you're trying to figure out how to break out of that. So so where do you start? Where do you go from here?

Speaker 2:

Well, I would say our number one is start where you are. Yeah, consistency matters more than amount. Yeah, especially when it comes to tithing Habits, right Like developing that habit of giving.

Speaker 1:

And just putting it in your budget, putting it in your schedule, knowing that, hey, I need to build this muscle of giving. I got to start somewhere. I might as well, start small and just make it a habit.

Speaker 2:

Right, and I was just thinking how, in other cultures that you know, even other faiths.

Speaker 2:

I'm just thinking of Judaism. When a Jewish person is going to the Holy Land and they're going to go on a trip, a lot of times people that are in their synagogue will give them envelopes of cash and the reason they give it to them is to have that person who's going. They take that cash and when they're walking through the streets in Jerusalem, say to the Temple Mount or wherever they're going, they're handing it all out to the beggars. Oh, wow.

Speaker 1:

I know and so-.

Speaker 2:

It's not even for them.

Speaker 1:

They're giving them money.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, to be able to give to other people. Yes, to give away, and because they recognize it as a blessing, I love that. Yeah, and so anyway, just that consistency.

Speaker 1:

It will become a part of your muscle. Yeah, I love that You're strengthening that. I love that. Yeah, number two, practice Ooh so good as a blessing. And pointing out the things that you have, not the things that you don't have. That's right, right. And then focusing on, like maybe even how to figure out how to start giving out of that right, like there's again, when you're giving, you realize that you have enough, Like there's that brain science that comes into that, that exercise of being able to give you start to think, oh, I actually do have enough.

Speaker 2:

I do have more than I need, and I was thinking something that you and I do. We go on walks pretty frequently, and when we go on our walks we kind of do this thing where it's like a gratitude walk. Yeah, as we're walking, we just start we point out the things we just start pointing out all the things that we're thankful for, all the things we're giving our gratitude to the Lord and and there's so much in gratitude, and how powerful that is when we have a thankful, grateful heart.

Speaker 1:

Yes.

Speaker 2:

You know, I just keep thinking about the children of Israel that were stuck in the desert for 40 years and they were so close to the Holy Land. They were so close but because they were complaining and basically like yelling at God, saying why did you take us out of Egypt where we could have whatever we wanted? Now we're eating this and that, and so the Lord kept him in the desert for 40 years. And I just think about if our kids are coming to us with thankfulness and gratefulness and their hearts of gratitude, we are more wanting to bless them when they come to us and like we loved it when we went out as a family and got ice cream.

Speaker 2:

It makes us want to do ice cream again as parents, and so we have a heavenly father, Abba, Papa, God, you know, you hear all these terms right. And so when we have thankfulness and gratefulness and we are saying those things to the Lord, oh my gosh, it unlocks our hearts and it helps us to be able to get the right perspective and it kills that scarcity mindset it really does or that disgruntled complaining mindset yeah. So I'm all about that, woo.

Speaker 1:

Love it. Here's a. Here's another practical. Make giving decisions together as a couple or family. If you're married or have a family like, invite your people into the giving decision.

Speaker 2:

It's so good because, then they get to be a part of the story too, and they get to see how it unfolds.

Speaker 2:

It's an adventure, it is and you know, even like, we have a couple of orphans that we support as a family and so it's been neat for the kids to see these kids that we support around the world and they're in different locations. And Ben, in case you guys don't know, he's like a big softie. He really, really is. He's a big softie, but bringing the kids into that has been so good because we're instilling that into them and we pray that they continue it on as adults when they're parents with their kids, because there's always need in the earth and we get to partner with the Lord on this. Yes, we do. We get to partner with him. Yeah, we get to partner with him, so fun.

Speaker 1:

And the last point we have here is just building, giving into your budget right Set it as a priority, not as an afterthought. And we talk with our kids about the five buckets of finance. We talk about spending, saving, investing, giving and tithing, and so that's just one of those buckets right. We know the tithe is kind of an automatic thing, right?

Speaker 1:

The 10%, but consider giving and also consider putting that in as a percentage base, right? So as your income grows, your giving grows and it's just kind of a natural thing. So those are some practical steps with just how to get started right where you are and if you're not tithing, obviously you to do that first, like that's not even considered giving, that's just kind of like your duty.

Speaker 2:

So this is like the joy of the giving piece where it's like going beyond.

Speaker 1:

But yeah, I mean obviously like you got to start somewhere. If you're not tithing, try tithing, Test God in that he even says it. That's Malachi.

Speaker 2:

And even if it's two mites, yeah, exactly two little pennies. Yeah, gotta start somewhere so, but what comes?

Speaker 1:

what do we get back? What is the?

Speaker 2:

what is the reward? What do we get back? What?

Speaker 1:

do we get back, we get joy yes and I think we get a joy that even transcends our circumstances absolutely right, it's just something that's like yeah, I mean gosh. I definitely want a joy that transcends circumstances.

Speaker 2:

Absolutely, and I feel like giving.

Speaker 1:

is that pathway to that? We have freedom from money's grip on our hearts. Absolutely so when we're giving, we're free. We're free from that materialism. When we're giving, we're modeling the kingdom values for our kids.

Speaker 2:

Yes.

Speaker 1:

So that's a huge one, especially when you're partnering and when you're doing as a family and you're bringing them into it and you're inviting them into it.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, that's massive, absolutely.

Speaker 1:

And then also this can't be understated when you're giving, you're actually getting eternal treasures.

Speaker 2:

Things that you don't even know about and that are going to blow our minds in eternity. Well, and if we can just pause on this for a second, because I know, for a long time, when I was growing up, I just could not wrap my head around eternal treasures.

Speaker 1:

I was like well, yeah, what are those? And?

Speaker 2:

why does it even matter? And it was like, well, here I have this need on earth. And it was almost like, oh yeah, but I'll get to be with Jesus. He's the only treasure that I'll need, right, and? But as I've gotten older and I've studied it a little bit more, what I am understanding is that it's not. Yes, I w we will be with him. It's going to be amazing. I can't wait.

Speaker 1:

It's going to be glorious.

Speaker 2:

Um, however, he has gifts that he wants to give and it brings him joy to give you the gifts and the treasures that you've stored up in heaven that he has seen. That's so crazy. Yes.

Speaker 1:

Right and Matthew? He tells us point blank do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth but store up for yourself treasures in heaven, and so that's a command right. So getting into that mindset you're talking about, that's massive Thinking about what we do as being an investment into treasure in heaven and not shrinking away from that but like hey, this is cool. This is going to reap dividends eternally. I'm going to be excited about this gift, whatever it is whatever this eternal treasure is.

Speaker 1:

I'm going to really like it because Jesus told me that this is what we should do. This is what we should prioritize.

Speaker 2:

Absolutely. Yeah, so that's so cool, I'm going to really like it, because Jesus told me that this is what we should do. This is what we should prioritize.

Speaker 1:

Absolutely. Yeah, so that's so cool. Yeah, so good, so good. And then what's the last one, ben, last one. Romans 12 to this is do not be conformed to the patterns of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of our mind. I think giving is one of those things that helps renew our mind. It's just one of those principles. It's in the word and we need to be transformed by the word.

Speaker 2:

Transformed.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, but when we give, I think there's actually a transformation that takes place and I think it helps renew our mind. It helps us to break from materialism. It helps us to focus on our own circumstances. There's brain science behind it that talks about things being unlocked, our reward center and our brain. I mean, there's just so many cool things that happen when you give. It's just part of that renewing of our mind.

Speaker 2:

It's part of it, it's freedom.

Speaker 1:

It is. It's freedom. For you, it's freedom, yeah.

Speaker 2:

It's freedom for you and we I cannot say enough we get to partner with the Lord.

Speaker 1:

Yes.

Speaker 2:

It's so cool.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, it.

Speaker 2:

It's so cool.

Speaker 1:

And on top of that we get eternal rewards.

Speaker 2:

Well, yes, that part, too, is cool, absolutely, absolutely. I love everything that we just talked about. It's a fun topic. It is a fun topic.

Speaker 1:

We've had a lot of joy in it and we want to encourage anybody just to go for it. You know, like to change that perspective because it really is freeing. There's so much that comes with it and I think at the end of the day, God loves a cheerful giver.

Speaker 2:

Learning how to be cheerful in our giving is so important. He loves that and he's just smiling on all of us. He really is.

Speaker 1:

He's not standing there with a big stick as you're giving pennies and smacking you. Yeah, you didn't give enough.

Speaker 2:

And I was just thinking of some of my history of giving with the Lord and back when I was like single and waiting tables and when I was a missionary and you know, out in the mission field and barely had any money, and the Lord would whisper to my heart, I want you to give this money. And it'd be like you know well, I was going to use that to go, you know, get a haircut or something, and then the Lord would provide somebody who would cut my hair for me for free and because I and do a better job than what I would have ever paid.

Speaker 1:

Right.

Speaker 2:

I mean, there's so many, there's just so many stories I can't even.

Speaker 1:

Yeah.

Speaker 2:

Begin.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, and even even thinking beyond just giving financially, giving of your time, giving of your things, like there's just, there's so much in that concept of giving that we just relegate to finances. But if you can be a, giver a true giver and you can be cheerful in that there's so many ways to do that, to see that, come to life, even outside of finances, Absolutely Right. So so good.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, and I just want to say too, as we're talking about this, that I'm just going to bring this caution that there have been families that we've known that maybe one spouse is more of a giver than the other and they're giving away, like the mortgage payment and you know all those things, and so we would say that you know, make sure that your bills are paid and you're on the same, yeah, on the same page, moving forward.

Speaker 2:

Now that doesn't mean if the Lord says to both of you I want you to empty your bank accounts out, that you don't do that. You absolutely do what the Lord is saying to do. But you need to be on the same page and you don't want to be evicted from your house because you gave it all away. Be smart, be a manager of it, but put it in your diet as well. So I think there's extremes on both sides.

Speaker 1:

There is yeah, but I never.

Speaker 2:

I rarely see the extreme that I just shared.

Speaker 1:

Yes, I don't think I've ever. I'm thinking of one couple. Okay, yeah, one couple, yeah. And that was going on and we see lots of misers. Yeah, yeah, is definitely on the side of the misers, yeah yeah, yeah, but anyway, I just wanted to throw that out there in case there was anybody that was like well. Elizabeth maybe. Yeah, make sure your kids eat.

Speaker 2:

Yeah like make sure they're eating, make sure you like bills paid Right exactly, be a good steward.

Speaker 2:

Be a good steward, and you know, we have always in our marriage we've always tried to be a good steward of everything God's given us. And even when we've had empty rooms, you know we've always the Lord's filled them, and you know if we've made extra. You know, I mean, just all of a sudden it's like oh gosh, we have all this soup and so we give it to a neighbor and then we find out the neighbor has no food.

Speaker 2:

I mean just like, not because they couldn't get it but just because they were traveling or whatever, and it's just unique to see how God will orchestrate the things. Listening to him and letting him direct. That it's so fun. It is fun. It's fun to do it with you too.

Speaker 1:

It is, it's amazing. Is it amazing to do it with you? Yes, that's what you're saying. That's exactly right.

Speaker 2:

You're hilarious, okay? Well, thank you for being a part of our One Blessed Mess today, and don't forget to subscribe and share with a friend like share heart. All the things, all the things, no matter how you're watching or listening to this. We are so grateful. We just got a notification that we have had a thousand podcasts downloaded, so that is not including YouTube.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, that's not including YouTube.

Speaker 2:

But this is all the other ways that people are listening to it, and we are noticing that there are people listening to it around the world. So, super exciting and we hope it's blessing you, we can travel all those places oh let's go.

Speaker 2:

I can't wait. Sign me up. Sign me up, but also follow us on Instagram. Our one blessed mess, and then we have the same on Facebook and we just want to say thank you for being a part of this. We really appreciate the feedback we get from you and on the connection, and if you have something that you're like gosh, I would love to hear what Ben and Liz's thoughts are on this. We would probably do an episode for you, but until that, next time that we connect, we would love to say embrace your, embrace your beautiful mess, because if our mess can be blessed, what, benjamin? What is?

Speaker 1:

it, then so can yours.

Speaker 2:

Then so can yours have a great day.

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