Liz: 0:12

Welcome to our One Blessed Mess. This is Ben and Liz, and we are here telling you our story of raising six kids that we had in eight years, managing our entrepreneurial home with two businesses, homeschooling, and currently navigating life with four teenagers, plus seven chickens and two dogs, just to keep life interesting.

Ben: 0:32

Today's conversation topic is about it is about a double entrepreneurial home.

Liz: 0:41

That's funny to say. Say it again, okay, double.

Ben: 0:44

Double entrepreneurial home.

Liz: 0:50

We cannot confirm or deny that we did not have to speak it into our phones to be able to spell entrepreneurial.

Ben: 0:58

You know, both of us. Oh, Ben, don't say that Not great. No, we're not out of this.

Liz: 1:04

It's a miracle that our kids can spell like they're really good spellers. We survive on spell check.

Ben: 1:10

Yes, this is true, this is true, spellcheck was not a thing, we would have a big problem.

Liz: 1:14

Yes, yes, you would be texting me all kinds of terrible things, I'm sure. Oh boy, so talk about it. What are we talking about?

Ben: 1:23

Well, we're going to talk about just what we've done and our journey of a double entrepreneurial home. And what that means is basically we just have two businesses, two separate businesses. We don't work in each other's business.

Liz: 1:36

No Two separate businesses.

Ben: 1:37

We've tried a little bit of that. It doesn't work too well actually.

Liz: 1:39

Oh yeah, Turns out.

Ben: 1:41

I'm a little bit of a control freak, ooh, so yeah.

Liz: 1:44

Well, so am I.

Ben: 1:55

I can be too. That's true. Yeah, that's true, it's fine, but you didn't really want me selling skincare, though, no, or makeup, no no, no, I'm not really a good salesman.

Liz: 2:02

You're much better. You're much better sales woman than I am. Okay, but you don't want me programming your websites. There's been some times I'm going to this is, this is on topic, I'm not getting off topic, but there's been some times I've come into your office and you're just sitting there looking at your screen so intense, so intense, and I'm like what if I did this? What if I did this?

Ben: 2:19

Wouldn't, I wouldn't be happy.

Liz: 2:20

No, that's true.

Ben: 2:21

Start punching things? Yeah, that's true. So why don't we just start up with this question, liz? Okay, this question, liz? Okay. Why in the world would you not go the traditional route of Susie Homemaker? Oh, you're asking me this question, okay, but instead, why did you feel the need to jump into business when I was already doing business stuff?

Liz: 2:46

So, here you had your business, you were already working.

Ben: 2:49

Yeah.

Liz: 2:49

Well, well, actually you're kind of do stuff on the side you were working that's true.

Ben: 2:53

I yeah, I hadn't gone full time into my own gig yet.

Liz: 2:57

That's right, that's right, so so basically just to tell you how it began, I guess, is when we were when I was pregnant with number four. There there we go, everything's around pregnancy. But when I was pregnant we just I mean we had more month than money and it was I mean we were making money, but it was like there was nothing ever for extra. I should say.

Liz: 3:20

And very little extra. I would scrimp and save all my birthday money that I got. I was, you know, selling colos at these like little clothes boutiques and things from the kids, that they outgrew them. You know all these kinds of things and you know we weren't going in debt. But we, we just could not do anything if we did anything extra you know, right, right, I mean yeah, and and.

Liz: 3:41

date nights consisted of uh, we would get a babysitter, all of our money went towards the babysitter, but we would go and do like coffee dates.

Ben: 3:49

And like, maybe split a coffee even.

Liz: 3:51

Yes, that did happen. We went to Barnes and Nobles and because we always I babysat so much growing up that I wanted to make sure that whoever our babysitter was, that we were paying that individual really, really well. So anyway, that was always a first priority. But we would have like dinner dates at home. I mean, there was so much going on. We did what we could. We did what we could. We sometimes switched off with other families where they took our kids and we took their kids, but sometimes that was really stressful. People, those of you who can conquer that and are really good at it, we're for you. Yeah, I know, because not everybody's kids are the same.

Ben: 4:23

Let's just say, it's true.

Liz: 4:25

Anyway. So when I was pregnant with number four, I began to pray and ask the Lord if he would give me an opportunity to make some money, because there was just no way that I could go get a part time job.

Ben: 4:36

Right.

Liz: 4:37

Weekends were very special to us because you worked all week long. You were working long hours, putting in a lot of hours, and so it was just, it was tough, and that's when I started Blazy's Bows, which we talked about in our first episode. Um, and I started blazey's bows, that's when we were putting what was it I put on her head? Okay, rose syrup yeah, and it took her a few hairs and then to try to get it off. I was like licking her head and like a what a mother cat.

Liz: 5:03

It was terrible to try to get the bow off and then those bows became candy and you could never reuse them. But anyway, they started becoming popular. So I started making this little bow company called Lazy's Bows.

Ben: 5:14

But again it was me pregnant of course, I think you hired a graphic designer, didn't?

Liz: 5:17

you, I did A really cute one. Yeah, his name is Ben Should hire him Anywho.

Liz: 5:33

So then I had an opportunity that came across my doorstep basically, and it was a business opportunity with a beauty company and I said yes, and it was direct sales and so network marketing, and it was something that I was like, okay, I can learn this, I know I can do this, and so it really just started out just to make a couple extra hundred dollars a month. And it ended up growing and growing and growing, because there was a part of me that was coming alive, and so your question is about why was I not Susie Homemaker? What?

Ben: 6:01

did you say yeah, like what got you to that place where we ended up having two businesses born out of the house?

Liz: 6:07

Well, we needed money.

Ben: 6:09

True, I mean, we needed money, but I think you touched on the part I was trying to get at. There was something in you that came alive when you started venturing out into that entrepreneurial journey, you were taking little steps right, right you were testing the waters with Blazy's bows. Then this other thing came and it felt good you were holding appointments.

Liz: 6:32

You were doing stuff you were getting out of the house.

Ben: 6:35

There was a part of you that had kind of died in some ways.

Liz: 6:39

Yeah, and there's nothing wrong with being a stay-at-home mom. I became a work-from-home mom and that looks different. I was going out of the house some, not a ton but I was finding that I had been putting myself last which is what most women do, and it wasn't necessarily that this was putting me first, but it was giving me a outlet.

Ben: 7:01

You were enjoying it.

Liz: 7:02

I was enjoying it and I'm a leader, I mean I can't apologize for that I'm definitely a leader.

Ben: 7:08

In fact, you were my youth leader.

Liz: 7:09

Yes, a long time ago. This is not an episode about that. Keep moving.

Ben: 7:15

I just want to say there's five years difference between us.

Liz: 7:18

Oh, we're going there Now everybody knows, yes, but it wasn't, and you might've been my youth leader.

Ben: 7:23

But there was no romance until you were like after I lived overseas and I had been somewhere else, I was of age. I was of age. Don't get too excited people, I was of age.

Liz: 7:31

Yes, you were in college and there was no romantic anything ever. In fact, I thought you were so great. I tried to set you up with at least three of my friends, and one of them with my. I also tried to set you up with my sister, encouraging you to date my sister, but anyway, that has nothing to do with being an entrepreneur.

Ben: 7:48

That's yes, okay, you're right. You're right, we got to get back on track here. Okay, so sorry, but I think the point is is you were a leader.

Liz: 7:55

Yes, you've always been a leader, yeah.

Ben: 7:57

And there was a part of you that just wasn't being fulfilled, in a sense. Yeah, I'm not saying that it wasn't your.

Liz: 8:05

you know you know, being a mom.

Ben: 8:06

Yeah, Like that was, that was fulfilling a longing in your heart but, there was more in your heart Right and you started to realize that when you started stepping out little by little into that entrepreneurial journey.

Liz: 8:19

Yeah, and it was. It took me a while to even accept. Like I'm an entrepreneur, I have a business, you know and and I started building a really large team and I mean just very large team.

Ben: 8:29

Yeah, yeah, yeah, it became a really large team, yeah.

Liz: 8:30

And I mean just Very large team.

Ben: 8:31

Yeah, yeah, yeah, it became a very large team and we were yeah, we were meeting new people and there was a lot of fun involved and all that too.

Liz: 8:37

Traveling.

Ben: 8:38

So there was a social aspect, there was an achieving aspect that you were fulfilling.

Liz: 8:43

There was a lot that was kind of coming along, yeah, and a lot of finances.

Ben: 8:46

Yeah, even rewards. There's like different rewards with just you doing your business and all the things that happened, yeah, and it was great. And so then we started to hit just some challenges running two businesses. I had my schedule, you had your schedule, and oftentimes we would forget to just even talk about each other's businesses.

Liz: 9:08

Each other's schedules yeah, each other's schedules. Well, that schedule, yeah, the schedule, and I'm just thinking too like in the process of me starting my business, it was like within a month or two, that you know that you had that wonderful miracle, that I had the opportunity to go out on my own. Yeah, you were able to go on your own.

Ben: 9:22

That's very true. You know it's funny how closely those timeframes were together. You're right, it was that year that we both started out on our double entrepreneurial home.

Liz: 9:32

It was amazing. Yes, it was amazing. It was amazing. It was like a transitional season.

Ben: 9:36

Honestly, and we both felt it, we both did it and we didn't really know what we were just saying yes to. We also didn't really know the challenges that we would face. No we didn't. So some of those challenges, I think we could go through them real quick. Okay, but like the time management piece. Yes, right, the scheduling piece.

Liz: 9:51

Yes.

Ben: 9:52

That was a difficult thing for us to figure out.

Liz: 9:54

Yep.

Ben: 9:55

Another thing was the concept of our traditional gender roles in the marriage and how those got stretched when we started on our own schedule, started with our own businesses, and then it was like, well, shoot, what normally happens now, when there wasn't that. Now we've got to figure out. What do we do?

Liz: 10:19

Right, that was fun. Those are some good conversations.

Ben: 10:24

Those were some good conversations. We had some good conversations when we were dating and getting married too.

Liz: 10:28

Yes, we did no. Okay, stay on topic. That's another episode, so okay.

Ben: 10:34

So we got stretched in our traditional roles, and what I mean by that is like who's going to cook, who's going to clean, who's going to do this? Do that, you know, like all of this stuff Because there was demands.

Liz: 10:44

There was demands.

Ben: 10:45

Or even For our businesses Watching the kids Like who's going to be with the kids when I was doing this or when you were doing that? How? Are we going to switch out. So we had to figure out the time management piece, we had to figure out the traditional roles, and then we also had to try to keep our family time sacred, yeah, sacred, which we, which was a lot tougher right, yeah, yeah.

Ben: 11:03

Because it not only was like oh, we had to move things around for my schedule, but we also had to move things around for your schedule too. Yes, so that was a challenge. And then there, ultimately, I think, was like kind of this pressure to just do it all well, yeah, right, to do family well, to do business well, to do our relationship well, yeah, and all of the things that you think are on your shoulder because-.

Liz: 11:26

Run the house well. Run the house well. I think that's the. I know that for me, was where I was feeling most guilt, because it's like laundry or the meals, or yeah.

Ben: 11:37

That makes sense. So one might ask why would you ever do any of that? Is that biblical to?

Liz: 11:45

have two businesses in the home. Yes, it is.

Ben: 11:49

You may be thinking that.

Liz: 11:50

And we might have an answer.

Ben: 11:53

Let's see, let's jump in. How about we go to Proverbs 31?

Liz: 11:57

Yes, that's such a good chapter.

Ben: 12:00

It is a good chapter. It is a good chapter P-31. P-31. I think I'm married to P-31 because you're doing business and the woman in Psalms 31 definitely did business. Yes, she did. What did she do she?

Liz: 12:11

was above rubies, she was trading and she was also purchasing land. She was in real estate. Yeah, yep.

Ben: 12:18

So there was that aspect of the Proverbs 31, woman being in business doing entrepreneurial type things, and if her husband was known at the gate then what does that mean?

Liz: 12:30

He was trading, or he was a man of business as well, because that's where all the transactions happened was in the gate, and he back in those days, yeah, and so he was known at the gate and so he had a good reputation.

Ben: 12:42

He was known in business, and so here we have a couple we think they were both entrepreneurial in some aspects and it's in P31. That's like the typical or not the typical. That's like the standard that we think of when we think of a woman, especially in marriage. So it's like, hey, right there, the standard that we kind of all want to live up to as godly women or I guess not all, because I'm not a godly woman, but I'm a godly man who hopes that my woman lives up to these standards.

Liz: 13:13

Have you memorized the chapter yet? No, oh, come on.

Ben: 13:15

Ben Come on. I don't have to.

Liz: 13:16

I can just look at it Every morning when I wake up, I just see it right there, okay.

Ben: 13:21

Is that too?

Liz: 13:21

much. No, tell me more, tell me more.

Ben: 13:25

So I think, right there, right, there's an example of a wife Right?

Liz: 13:29

No, it's true. It's true, conducting business, doing entrepreneurial things. Well, it's so interesting that the example that's given of an entrepreneur is in Proverbs 31.

Ben: 13:38

I just think that's amazing that.

Liz: 13:39

that's the example, yeah.

Ben: 13:40

Yeah, and then another New Testament example is Aquila and Priscilla in Acts right. So they're tent makers and they hook up with Paul and then their ministry together with Paul, but they're both in the tent making trade and it's not just the husband, it's also the wife, so that's pretty cool. And then also Paul is a tent maker, so they shared a lot in common with him and I think they were together for a little over a year I don't remember the exact number of months, but so that's.

Ben: 14:09

That's really fascinating right You've got, and they were in the same business together, so a little different than us, right.

Liz: 14:15

There are husband and wife teams out there. We know that. I mean, there's amazing husband and wife teams, yeah.

Ben: 14:22

Yeah, we haven't. We haven't cracked the code on that one yet. Maybe we will, maybe we will, we'll see. So there's definitely a biblical foundation for doing entrepreneurship in the context of family, in the context of marriage yes and just going for it.

Ben: 14:35

And so, like tell us a little bit about maybe I don't know, like from when you got into more of your skincare business and your beauty business, like what were some of the challenges of like having to go through the traditional roles and maybe letting go of some of those things, or trying to get creative and how you kind of process that.

Liz: 15:05

So I'm a big believer that you buy help like you pay for help, because being an achiever, which is what I am, and Clifton Strength Finders achievers in my top five, and then I have also activators, so I like to get things done and make them- I like that about you.

Ben: 15:24

Quick yes, in fact, we just cleaned my office and I was frozen in the details and you came along and activated me.

Liz: 15:32

Yes, this is actually very true. His office was intense and I've been saying for a while now I'm like, hey, why don't you, let me get in there with you and we can get this done? And so we had a break I guess it was a Saturday afternoon, I don't even remember and we got in there and we knocked it out in like what two hours?

Ben: 15:51

or something. Yeah, we did so. Anyway, that's taking me a lot longer, yeah.

Liz: 15:55

Yeah. So for me, um, being, you know, an achiever and and having a home and having a family and having a husband and also having a business, something has to give, because I only have so many hours in a day, I only have so many hours in a week, you know, and on top of that, just with the demands of what my business was growing in, and it was a financial blessing to our family and I mean it was a lot of monetary, amazing things and also to, you know, the kids being raised in in a dual entrepreneurial home. There was just things that were not important. They were not the ones that were going to care if mom cleaned the toilets or not, they do not care.

Liz: 16:37

They do not care if I'm the one folding their laundry and putting it away. They really do not care. So the things that were more important, obviously, was, you know, face-to-face time with them, and I would much rather pay someone else to do the things that are on my to-do list or my bug list and spend the time with you. Date nights were non-negotiable. You and I would go on dates weekly.

Ben: 16:58

We had to learn that. We had to learn that it was non-negotiable, non-negotiable.

Liz: 17:04

And then also to taking time out individually for the children and family time, everybody together. And we were adding more kids in the midst of it, because number four was born after I started my business. Okay, number five was born, number six was born, and so you know, we doubled in kids while I'm building a very successful business. So some of those things needed to go off my plate and I was making good money and there were people around me who wanted to have extra jobs. They weren't willing to do what I was doing, which is fine, and so I hired out help for house cleaning. I hired laundry fairies that's what I called them, laundry fairies. They would come over because you guys, can you imagine eight people and the laundry? Like, just think about that, eight people in the laundry and it's a lot.

Liz: 17:56

Oh, the mounds of just a week, you know, and I would try to do, you know, a load a day and you know, trying to do all that. But it was just like ridiculous trying to match all the socks and you know, especially in your potty training. I mean, there's just so much that is going on. So I hired somebody. You know I hired whether it was somebody who was older, who just wanted to get in a home with kids, and they would just sit there and talk to me as they're folding socks and even if I'm on the floor and I'm playing with my kids, it's better than me folding socks.

Liz: 18:23

You know, and you know, I loved it when I had laundry fairies, because all the drawers were always so organized. It was just so nice, you know, and some of the things I reserved only for myself, like I didn't really have them, you know, always doing all of our laundry, but but okay, then, um, I had a house cleaner. Um, I, I had I'm just thinking in the house um, homework helper. Um, so when the kids got older and they were all in school and this is before we were like full on homeschooling um, they would come home and kind of called it the witching hour, because it was like everybody has to get their homework done. I'm trying to get it done before dinner. And there's just I would make sure I didn't book any calls or meetings or anything in that you know, three to five time but five kids all needing help for homework on all different levels, and you're, you're helping one and somebody gets up from the table and they're gone, right, and where are they? Up a tree, like you know, there was those things.

Liz: 19:24

So I hired a homework helper and typically it was just somebody who was in college or high school. I think I had some in high school like seniors and stuff that they just got off school early and they came in and they did homework, and so it was just like knocking it out, and sometimes I would be present doing the homework too, with them, you know, but it just, you know, a couple of days a week, I mean it just it took the stress right off of me so that I could put my mind at ease instead of trying to be everything. I feel like there's some other things that I did. Oh, I did what I call $10 jobs, and so whomever was there, whether it was the laundry fairy, my house cleaner.

Liz: 20:04

Sometimes the homework helper did it, but like you know anybody that was there or I just would hire people who wanted to just make some extra money. You know, girls from our church or something like that were in college and I would pay them 10. Now you probably would need to pay 20. I mean, I got more, but it would just be the things that were on my bug list, like cleaning out underneath the kitchen sink, organizing this closet going through this toy bin and throwing away all the things I just couldn't get to, and it was more beneficial for me to spend that time with family or with my business.

Ben: 20:39

Right, and so anyway, no, that's great. I remember having a realization because you were doing a lot of your business in the evenings. Yeah, Right, and so I would get off work around five or six and then we would transition. I would start watching the kids and start doing more of the house stuff. You would go into kind of full-time business mode and I remember, you know, trying to think, okay, what am I going to do for dinner Because Liz is on tonight.

Liz: 21:02

So now you know what am I going to do.

Ben: 21:03

So I would start thinking like well shoot, if I'm going to cook, I need to, like, quit work a little earlier and then get everything prepped and ready to go so we can have a meal. And get everything prepped and ready to go so we can have a meal and then it just dawned on me one evening. It's like you know what, why don't I just keep?

Ben: 21:20

working that hour, or maybe even two, that I would have gotten off earlier to prep and to get all the stuff ready. Why don't I just keep working and order food? And at that point it made more financial sense to just keep working order takeout. Let's just have a meal and let's focus on having the meal together instead of me trying to quit work early so that I could make this? Meal and then eat together.

Liz: 21:48

It actually saved us money by ordering out, which is crazy to think about. Yeah, it's kind of, and that's a different mindset.

Ben: 21:54

It is. That's a growth mindset Right Instead of a fixed mindset Right, and that actually kind of goes a little bit to the book reference that we're pulling some of this from, which is the E-Myth Revisited.

Liz: 22:07

Right, which we didn't know this book before we were living it. We were, yeah, we were. So this book is basically saying what we already did.

Ben: 22:12

Yeah, it's like jumping into that growth mindset. Stop thinking like an employee and think about an entrepreneur, think about systems, think about business systems that allow you to grow instead of cap you where you're at, and so that's like a mindset right. We had to break free of some of the things that we thought we should do and just focus on the things that we needed to do in order to get past, like some of the limitations we were running into.

Liz: 22:38

Well, and also too, I mean, with the meal thing. You know everybody has different weeks. All kinds of stuff happens, like kids are sick, and then, you know, somebody comes from visiting you know from out of town, or there's just all these things. And so sometimes in that area, you know, I'd be like you're on for dinner tonight, like there's I am. I've been, you know, unable to do what I need to do for the last three days, you know, and or I couldn't get a crock pot meal in early enough.

Ben: 23:03

I mean it's just like because it's life. Yeah, and so you know, okay, what's the what's a good decision, and we yeah exactly we both was working, we can afford it, yeah, so it's got to make sense financially. But yeah, yeah, we just had to kind of rethink and reshape some of the way we did things in order to make it work a little bit more holistically. We weren't so concerned about some of the feelings of, hey, I have to do this because I'm the man, or hey, you have to do that because you're the woman.

Ben: 23:32

Instead, we looked at it as a partnership. How do we do this together to be successful, Both of us covering? Obviously we've got to take care of our family, but we also have to take care of our businesses. And how do we think holistically, in a way that I support you, you support me, and we're not going around saying, hey, you didn't do this because that was your job?

Liz: 23:53

Right.

Ben: 23:54

Instead, I'm here to help you. How can we best fit together, how can we dialogue about it so that we both end up what we want and what we need.

Liz: 24:01

That's true, yeah, it's a little different, a little different, yeah, and we I mean also too, and being both entrepreneurs, the difference between an entrepreneurial mindset and a fixed mindset or an employee mindset is income, is it can be whatever you want it to be Like, if you're willing to put in the time.

Ben: 24:20

In some ways it's limitless, almost, I mean there's natural limits with things, but when you start thinking in that entrepreneurial mindset the only limitation is more of yourself at that point.

Liz: 24:30

Right, exactly, and also too. I'm just thinking like when you're clocking in at eight and clocking out at five. You know you may get a raise every year you know those kinds of things, but for us the raise could be any day like it was daily, and so it it it. We had to change our mindset on how we're doing all of these things, right, yeah? And and we saw it as a gift you know, to be able to employ people or, you know, support the local restaurant down the street.

Ben: 25:00

I mean it's almost an investment. I think, yeah, like, yeah, almost an investment, yeah Right, because you're not only you're supporting them, but you're supporting yourself.

Liz: 25:06

Right.

Ben: 25:06

Being able to do the things that you only could do.

Liz: 25:09

Right.

Ben: 25:09

Right, someone couldn't run your business for you, but they could surefold your laundry.

Liz: 25:13

Oh my gosh. And you know those people. They love being in our homes. I mean, still to this day. Some of them have started listening to the podcast. So if you're watching this, you know who you are, but you know it's so fun because it's been neat to see how you know people come and go in and out of your life for all kinds of reasons. I've always heard it say some people are in your life for a moment, some people are in your life for a season or a lifetime, and we've had very seasoned people, you know our moment people, and I love that we were able to have them and invite them in because, hello, let's be clear, it's chaotic, it's a little bit of a circus.

Liz: 25:50

It's a little bit of a circus, and even today, with teenagers, I mean, before we started this episode today, it's like, okay, you guys, okay, I mean we were just trying to dialogue. Okay, what are we going to talk about in this episode? And I mean it was like a revolving door in our bedroom. It's like one kid, then another kid, then another kid, then another kid, and I mean they're just opening up the door and jumping on the bed and I was like hi, mom and dad. I mean they want to talk because they're teenagers. And it's like, okay, we need to record, but we're going to take time out still, and they're first, you know. I mean, well, we're first for each other, but they are, you know, next. And so, anyway, it was really cute. I know I'm like it's chaotic, they're a lot of fun, it's chaotic.

Ben: 26:32

They're a lot of fun, so okay. So why don't we? Unless you had something else, why don't we just jump into some like practical takeaways?

Liz: 26:41

Okay.

Ben: 26:41

What do you think Sure Like, just run through them. Sure Go ahead we talked about a lot of things, but let's just kind of go through some of the takeaways. So one of the things that we realized was like intentional scheduling, right. So this is just a practical. If you ever think about doing a dual entrepreneurial home, getting on the same page, schedule wise.

Liz: 27:01

Yes, super important. And how I did that is I like pen to paper.

Ben: 27:06

So, he you said a bad word, I know, yeah, ben doesn't.

Liz: 27:11

Yeah, he doesn't like that, he likes everything digital. Yeah, ben doesn't. Yeah, he doesn't like that, he likes everything digital. I'm getting better. I'm still getting better, getting better at it, but I like, I mean I still have my log. Let's just say you like analog I mean I still have, I have my calendar right here and it's, it goes in my purse.

Liz: 27:26

It's ancient, it's long in the museum I love it, um, but ben misses those things because he's not in my purse. He calls, he calls my purse the black hole. So what I did, especially back in the day when we were first starting out, is I put like a weekly view, you know Sunday through Saturday, or I put up like the whole month. Mom has this, mom is here, you put that in the kitchen.

Ben: 27:51

I did.

Liz: 27:52

I put it in the kitchen and we also hired help or I you know, we had somebody in the home always helping me with the kids, you know so that somebody, whomever it was, so I could get out and go to the grocery store, even you know, or that's the next thing, is outsourcing strategically. Yeah, oh, okay, I'm ahead of us, yeah.

Ben: 28:21

No, you're good, You're right on time.

Liz: 28:22

So yeah, thinking about how you can outsource and delegate the things that strategically need to be done that you don't have to do. Well, and back then, when I'm talking about in the beginning, they didn't have like DoorDash, there was no grocery store pickup.

Liz: 28:30

Like those things I dreamed about. There was nothing where you drive through a drive-thru and you can get your bread, milk and eggs Like those things I dreamed about. There was nothing where you drive through a drive-thru and you can get your bread, milk and eggs Like there was none of that. I had to schlep to the store with all of my children hanging all over me to be able to go to the back of the grocery store to get that one gallon of milk, you know. And so anyway, with hiring, help and outsourcing that, I would even like sometimes give a whole list to go to the grocery store for me and they would go run that errand and I had assistants in my office.

Liz: 29:00

I had virtual assistants. I had all those kind of things. I was outsourcing the things that someone I didn't necessarily have to put my hand to it. I could hire someone else to put their hand to it and they would do it much better half the time You're thinking like an entrepreneur. Yes.

Ben: 29:16

And by doing that this is the next point you let go of the shoulds. So you should do this. You don't really. I mean who says that you should do this? Who says that you have to do those things? We have it in our minds.

Liz: 29:28

It was me in my head.

Ben: 29:29

Yeah, and same thing for me, I got to get off work early so I can go start the dinner and spend an hour and a half prep and do all the things and it's like, well, do I have to?

Liz: 29:39

No, Can I just go take out? Well, actually, what would be fun is you would make an adventure for the kids and be like who wants to go with daddy to go run and get whatever it was, pick up pizza or-.

Ben: 29:48

Yeah, it still took me about 20 minutes, but shoot, sometimes it's a lot less.

Liz: 29:51

Well, and you got alone time with the kids.

Ben: 29:53

Oh yeah, that's true. I mean, that's huge, you know.

Liz: 29:56

And in your business a lot of what you're doing. Mine was different.

Ben: 30:00

True.

Liz: 30:02

Because I was in sales and really out there interfacing with the public.

Ben: 30:06

Right.

Liz: 30:06

But you, I mean you're behind a screen and so you know you're talking to people from all over.

Ben: 30:13

Yeah, programmers and yeah, sometimes internationally, yeah, mostly national, but yeah, well, and the thing is too, is like, even with the should right, let's just say, for instance, cooking dinner Because we had six kids the scale of that is significant.

Liz: 30:27

Right.

Ben: 30:28

We're talking about just cooking for yourself. That's a little different. But we're talking about cooking for eight people and then trying to prep for that Like that's how much hamburger meat we need now for taco. Yeah.

Liz: 30:45

Holy moly people. The other night I made we still we really prioritize sitting down as a family at the table. I mean it's you know, and these kids are hilarious right now because they're just giants and I mean they'll always be giants. I'm not going anywhere. They're all growing up Like they're all today. Somebody was not going to grow. Well, our youngest daughter today. She was measuring today and I'm still half an inch taller than her.

Liz: 31:03

She is determined, in the next week, couple of weeks, to surpass me, but anyway. But my point is is like the other night I made a chicken and rice dish. There was nothing left. You guys, and when I say nothing left, I mean the pan that everything was cooked in was gone. We had kids licking their plate. I'm glad you're laughing because it was like really. So the point we're trying to make is when you're making food for an army.

Ben: 31:30

Yeah, it's a significant time investment.

Liz: 31:32

It is.

Ben: 31:33

So the next one, focusing on partnership versus traditional roles. At the end of the day, what's going to matter, the thing that's going to matter, is that I supported you. You supported me. How that looks like doesn't have to be conformed to anybody else's image but us and the Lord. Right, we shouldn't just let the traditional part of it?

Ben: 31:54

overweigh the practical piece that we might need in that season. So partnership over tradition, in the sense of what the roles should look like, and again, these kind of all come from that idea of the E-Myth Revisited, which is a book that is by Michael Gerber and it's just got some great concepts about how to think beyond yourself as an employee and more of an owner or more of an entrepreneur.

Liz: 32:21

And it's a full mindset, because if you just have one entrepreneur in the home and that I would think would be probably more challenging in some ways, yeah, but in having two, we're both kind of thinking the same thing.

Liz: 32:38

We're kind of like, okay, we're heading in that direction and so when we were coming up to some of these things that we had to figure it out, I mean it required, and I just want to say also, it required a lot. But I also just want to say, if you're a stay-at home mom and you're not working outside the home, you work hard, you work hard. I was at work from home mom, so I was running a business out of our home, you know, and had a very thriving business. But doing all the things that we're talking about delegating, it is hard work. It is. And you hear these people who talk about, like you know, if I was going to go out and hire a wife, I mean there's no way you could even afford it because you got to be up throughout the night. You got to, you know, yeah it's priceless.

Ben: 33:23

It's absolutely priceless. Couldn't pay for that, yeah, so yeah, that's true.

Liz: 33:27

Yeah, well, and I do want to say something also too, because I know we're going to jump into some scriptures here in a minute, but I'm just thinking about, like you know, one of the things when you're an entrepreneur and we can maybe do another episode on like the mindset that you have and all that but when I was maybe four or five years into my business, you know, I was really seeking the Lord and I'm like, you know, how do you want me to do this?

Liz: 33:53

Because by that time it was like my business was growing and we were growing as a family, and you know, he was just so faithful. He was so faithful to answer, you know, any questions I had and to direct me. But I'm actually thinking of a story when we first moved into this house and, uh, there was, we were sitting down for dinner and it was time to to bathe kids, and so I was walking across the home and and I felt something in my hair and I was like what in the world is that? And I thought it was my bangs or something like coming down, and I fell up there and something moved on my head, and so I I grabbed it and and I'm like screaming screaming and I threw it and it scurried under our bed and I'm standing in our room screaming, with the bathtub running and of course, everybody comes running in like what's wrong, what's wrong.

Liz: 34:49

I'm like I just had a lizard in my head, on my head, and they're like how? I'm like I don't know and you're like did you go outside? I'm like no, I literally was sitting at the dinner table having dinner, got up, walked across the house and there's a lizard on my head, and so everybody you know, and when you scream like that, it like shakes your innards right so then all the kids were like trying to look under our bed with flashlights, trying to find this lizard. Do you remember that?

Ben: 35:13

I do.

Liz: 35:14

Okay, good. Then I went into the kitchen after a while because I told the kids they could have Italian soda. Isn't that funny? I remember that detail. I told them they could have Italian soda for dinner after dinner, and they had all been bathed, and so the first kid was there, which was our oldest, Elisha, and I was pouring it and I felt something move on my head.

Ben: 35:35

Again.

Liz: 35:36

Again. Now this is after I bathed the younger kids, so you have to understand when you're bathing like bending over the tub. So if anything was on my head it would have never stayed there. So I'm there and I feel something move in the kitchen on my head again and I'm like and I reach up and grab my head, another lizard, it's another lizard, I forgot about that.

Liz: 36:01

And I took it and I threw it across the kitchen, scream bloody murder and our son's standing there and he's like whoa, mom. And he was like growing. So he's like at eye. Now he's like almost six feet tall, but he was like eye level. Then he's like what happened? I go who put that on my head? And he's like what? And I was convinced that a child was pranking me by putting lizards on my head. That's funny.

Ben: 36:23

I wouldn't put it past him. I wouldn't put it past me.

Liz: 36:26

Yeah, well, we never found either lizard. Okay, I don't know if it was the same lizard, I don't know what was going on. So shortly after that, I had my team come to a beach house and we, um, what I would do is I would do these weekends where women would come that were on my team and we would spend time, you know, um training, goal setting. Um, you know, it was real, they were really rich and good, girlfriend time.

Liz: 36:50

And so, anyway, I like to get up early, early in the morning, and go to the beach and watch the sunrise. It's just something that I love, yeah, and especially since where we live, I never see the sun. It's so wooded so I never see the sun and I miss sunsets and sunrises. So, anyway, I'm out there and I'm having quiet time with the Lord and I just, you know, I'm listening, I'm listening to some worship music, um, and I just felt like the Lord, you know, impressed upon my heart. He and he said you didn't ask me about the lizards, and I'm like what?

Liz: 37:23

what say what? And I, I just whispered back in my heart. I was like I didn't know. I was supposed to and, and, and I just felt like the Lord whispered in my heart. Just well, that was me, and I'm thinking what, what? And so it sent me on this journey to begin to look through the scriptures about lizards, and lizards are in the Bible.

Ben: 37:48

Did you know that? What'd you find?

Liz: 37:49

Well, it's in Proverbs and it talks about although the lizards are small and you can grab them with your hand, you find them in the courts of kings. It's out of Proverbs and it was so, so precious, because I was having this inferior mindset, Like it was just, like I don't know if I can do this. We had just moved to a new state. Like I'm building yeah, I'm building a new location. I left another location that was thriving with a great team.

Ben: 38:23

How am I going to do this?

Liz: 38:24

You know we have, we have six kids, you know all these kinds of things, and, and it was like the Lord was just reminding me, because when I was growing up, um, my nickname in high school was Lizzie the Lizard. Anyway, did you know that?

Ben: 38:39

No.

Liz: 38:39

OK, I didn't think so. So it was Lizzie the Lizard, and so I've always like do you remember slam books?

Ben: 38:45

Yes, ok, so I always signed way back.

Liz: 38:47

I know I always signed in the slam books as Lizard, so that was Lizard. Lizzie as Lizard, so that was.

Ben: 38:53

Lizard. Yes, not Lizzie the Lizard, just Lizard.

Liz: 38:54

Well, people weren't supposed to know it was you?

Ben: 38:57

Oh, okay, because on that certain page it was like do you think?

Liz: 39:00

so-and-so is cute.

Ben: 39:01

That was your pseudonym.

Liz: 39:02

Yeah, and who do you like, like on page 79, you go through this whole notebook to get to who liked who and then you look back and say who is number 12? They think so-and-so is hot and you don't know who 12 is.

Liz: 39:17

Lizard thinks they're hot, but anyway. So it was just very something special to me and just like, even though I'm small, you find me in the courts of kings, and not that it has to be applied to me, but it was just like a little nudge from the Lord and that same morning and one of the reasons why I want to bring this up because we are talking about being entrepreneurs is I was sitting there at the water and I'm dialoguing and journaling about well, how am I going to build my business?

Liz: 39:47

And I just felt the Lord say in my heart look to your left, what do you see? And I looked down the coast and I felt like he said you know, what do you see? Can you see far? And I said, yes, I can see really far. Now look to your right, what do you see? I see very far. It was very vast and very open and looked out in front of me. What do you see? You know, it's so much space. I mean, it's just beautiful. Where our beach was, there was no high rises or anything, so it's just gorgeous. And then I felt like the lord was whispering to me in my heart you know, do you? You know?

Liz: 40:23

Do you want a fish? Because this whole ocean is filled with fish. And what kind of fish do you want? Do you want small fish? Do? What kind of fish do you want? Do you want small fish? Do you want large fish? Do you want a school of fish? Do you want fish that stay at the surface? Do you want fish that go down deep? And then, how are you going to fish? Are you going to stand on the edge of the shore and cast a line with a fishing pole? Are you going to take a net and cast it and catch a couple of them. Would you love to go?

Ben: 40:54

I'm the net guy. Yeah, he's the net guy speaking to me right now.

Liz: 40:57

Yeah, he loves the water. You get out there in the water and he's got a cast net and he's out there for hours, hours, hours. Um, and I love that because you come alive in nature. It's God's beautiful creation and I get it. So, anyway. But then it was like are you going to get in a boat? Are you going to wait out in the water with your reel or with your you know, your net? Are you going to get in a boat? Are you going to stay closer to shore? Are you going to go out? Are you going to get on a pier?

Liz: 41:22

Like it was all these questions and I just felt like the Lord was saying there's a lot of fish in the sea, and so why I'm saying that? Is because if you're an entrepreneur, you have to get in and fish. You can't just stand there and well, you can't just stand there and just gaze and expect these fish to jump into your lap.

Ben: 41:43

Right.

Liz: 41:43

I mean, I guess if they're salmon they will. I don't know, I've never been around salmon, but but the point is, is that how do you want to do this and how do you want to build your business? And it's available, especially if you have a desire in your heart to do something. You know, and so to me that was a really big encouragement in building my business. You know, to not just stay on the shoreline but to get in there and do it, and I know we're talking about all the practical things and how intentional yeah, meal plans and all this kind of stuff, but the truth is is that you know the fish are there right, this is bound to fall.

Ben: 42:19

To go get them.

Liz: 42:20

It's up to us. And how are you going to do it? I know how you're going to do it.

Ben: 42:23

You're going to cast net, he's ours Cast net. Yeah, man, that's good. That's a really encouraging story. I think it helps us kind of keep that in mind that like God's our partner in this and he was encouraging you to think about like how you know you were going to actually go about and do it, and that's awesome.

Ben: 42:43

Yeah, it's really cool. We've got some scripture takeaways. Let's look at Ecclesiastes 4, 9 through 10. Two are better than one because they have a good return for their labor. If either of them falls down, one can help the other up. So I feel like we kind of do that in this crazy entrepreneurial double entrepreneurial home that we have Dual entrepreneurial home Right.

Ben: 43:05

Like we've had ebbs and flows where, like you, know my business maybe not going well, but yours is and you're able to encourage me, and then I can, you know, reciprocate when the time comes where things aren't going well for you and they are for me, or you know, I think we're just we're able to kind of help each other out.

Liz: 43:20

And it's unique too, because a lot of times when you hear entrepreneurial homes, it's a lot of times it's a husband and wife doing the same one together.

Ben: 43:27

Ours was not the same, not the same, very different, distinctly different, different schedules, different schedules, all of it, and especially when 2020 came.

Liz: 43:35

I mean that yours was already online, but mine went fully online and that that changed a lot. Um, you know, I had to fish a different way.

Ben: 43:46

I don't learn how to do that.

Liz: 43:48

Um and and build my you know my business, and especially when the world was in such a crazy place. But yeah, but it still survived. Actually, it was my highest year, but anyway.

Ben: 43:57

Yeah, good time.

Liz: 43:58

Two is better than one.

Ben: 43:59

Two is better than one Boom boom. Let's wrap it up with Colossians 3, 23 to 24. Whatever you do, work at it with all of your heart as working for the Lord.

Liz: 44:09

Yeah. Not for human masters, so good.

Ben: 44:11

That's a huge mindset shift, right.

Liz: 44:15

It is yeah.

Ben: 44:16

Like even when you do work for human masters, knowing that really in the long run, you're working for the Lord, yeah. You know and think about it like that.

Liz: 44:24

We are always bringing that up with our kids.

Ben: 44:26

Oh yeah.

Liz: 44:26

Especially as we're cleaning the house.

Ben: 44:28

And especially as they start getting jobs and especially as they start getting jobs.

Liz: 44:35

Yes, they are oh yeah, oh yeah, yeah, it's, it's been an interesting journey hasn't it raising these teenagers, oh teenagers, oh teenagers, teenagers yeah, we had a family devotions yesterday and we were talking about, you know, happy hearts. Have a happy heart oh man, it's always challenging yeah, but good, I mean, we wouldn't trade it for anything.

Ben: 44:53

No, it's a good mess.

Liz: 44:54

We love it.

Ben: 44:55

We loved our blessed mess.

Liz: 44:56

Yeah, that's why we named this our blessed mess right.

Ben: 44:58

It's true, our 1BM.

Liz: 44:59

Our 1BM. I love that. Well, thanks for being a part of our one blessed mess today. Don't forget to subscribe and share with a friend who needs encouragement. Uh, we hope this encouraged you today. I mean, we're just talking about some practicals by having a dual entrepreneurial home and what that's like raising kids and homeschooling. But, um, you know, follow us on instagram, follow us on facebook, uh, like, share, do all the things that you have to do. Don't forget to subscribe, of course, and we are so thankful that you were here today. Thank you to everybody who's been sending us messages. It's so encouraging. I got another one today. I was like, wow, this is amazing, and so we are just so grateful and, honestly, until next time, embrace your beautiful mess, because if our mess can be blessed, what Ben?

Ben: 45:47

So can yours.

Liz: 45:48

So can yours have a blessed day.